Tuesday, October 10, 2006

I Will Perfect My Own Rice of People

Legendary auteur Edward D. Wood jr would have been 82 today. Now, y'all know I love me some Ed, so I'm posting a couple of clips from his films as a paltry tribute: Bela Lugosi's "Atomic Supermen" speech from Bride of the Monster, and the trailer for Glen or Glenda. The man made pure celluloid crap-you can't argue with that. Logically, a person should not enjoy repeated viewings of his films, but as I always say: TO HELL WITH LOGIC! Usually after I say that, I throw my glass of scotch into the fireplace, and then I storm out the front door in a grand and diva-like manner.

But I digress..

I submit, that the reason his films are so enjoyable, is because they're UNIQUE crap, all crafted with his skewed 'artistic' vision (I have to wonder what kind of movies he would make if he were still alive, what with all the advances in special effects. Would he still be lighting pie plates on fire?). They don't make crap like that anymore. Who do we have making lousy movies nowadays? Uwe Boll? Who the hell wants to watch a Uwe Boll movie over and over again? Plus Ed had that cross-dressing thing going for him. Are there any cross-dressing filmakers around anymore? Well, I guess there's Larry Wachowski (did he ever get his sex change operation? Hmm.), but he's kind of a recluse, and his movies aren't TOO bad ( I love Agent Smith too much to be able to sufficiently bad-mouth the Matrix trilogy, but then again I HATE Keanu Reeves...But not as much as I love Agent Smith, so no, I can't talk smack about the Matrix).

ANYWAY, Happy Birthday, Ed- you made garbage that makes people happy. That's a rare feat indeed.