Harper is on Spring Break this week, and wouldn't you know it, it's rained every day except today. Fortunately it's extremely nice outside this afternoon-sunny, 75 degrees-perfect weather for her to go ride her bike. So a few hours ago, I granted her request to go out and she immediately comes back in and asks "Where's my bike?". I get up and go look and it's nowhere to be seen:some scum sucking, bilge biting rat-bastard stole it.
Who does this? It's an old, crappy bike, the seat cushion is totally gone, it's like sitting on a hemorrhoid generator. Hell, I hope whoever stole it DOES get a scorching case of 'roids, if not worse. Actually, I hope they get polyps and they become so constipated that sitting on the bike would be pure torture, in which case, I hope they have to ride it forever.
Sonofabitch.
Believe it or not, I'm not as enraged as I was when it first happened (if I was, I wouldn't be able to type, the whole post would look like this :"UGCDLHVFOUYR!!). Once my neck cooled off-my neck gets all hot when I get mad-this thing popped into my head. See, I can never get mad enough that I don't remember stupid shit I've seen on tv over the years. It's technically not the same thing, but it's related. If I wanted to be all specific, I'd have to post a review of the Bicycle Thief or something. It's just been so long ago that I saw that and I'm still KIND OF pissed, so I don't think this would be the best time to pontificate about a classic Italian film. As it is, I'm having a hard time following the Fairly Oddparents, which is on tv right now. I think Timmy's in the hospital or something, I dunno.
At least no one stole his bike.
42 minutes ago
|